Connections, Cons, and Chaos: Reflecting on Social Media and a Midnight Wake-Up Call

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about how social media has changed the way we live—and how it’s affected my generation, Gen X, in a strange and complicated way.

We didn’t grow up with phones in our hands. Our friendships were built on passing notes in class, calling someone’s house and hoping their parents didn’t pick up, or just showing up on a friend’s porch unannounced. And back then, that kind of surprise felt… normal. Even welcome.

But last night, at 12:45 a.m., someone rang my doorbell.

It startled me awake. I didn’t rush to the door like we used to—I stood frozen. Instead of opening it, I cracked the window and asked, cautiously, “What do you want?” The man outside said, “Get your protections. People are breaking in.”

It was chilling. I didn’t know if he was warning me or testing me. Social media has filled my mind with stories—some true, some exaggerated—of burglars doing just that: ringing doorbells to see who answers, checking if a house is vulnerable. My first instinct wasn’t trust. It was fear. Primal fear in fact, as I gathered my "protections" as he warned me to do.

And there, folks, is the irony. The very idea of someone showing up at your doorstep, once a symbol of spontaneous connection, now feels like a potential threat. We’ve traded front porch visits for private messages, eye contact for emojis, and intuition for alerts and algorithms. Where we once traded baseball cards, we now trade stories-so many of which evoke a feeling of fear. In the wake of this digital age, we've traded some of our most precious commodities; our trust, our safety, and our reality.

At first, social media felt like magic for us Gen Xers. We reconnected with old friends, shared life’s milestones, and found a sense of belonging in the chaos of middle age. But somewhere along the way, it became louder, more performative. We started wondering if our lives were enough without filters, without followers, without all the fake news. And I am no different. I, too, have willingly embraced social media, sometimes even leveraging it. But now I sit and wonder, "at what cost?"

What have I traded? Did I even trade up? I don't believe so.

I know I am not alone. Now many of us are quietly stepping back. We still want connection—but real connection. The kind that doesn’t need to be posted or liked to matter. The kind that isn't based on who else is in that same connection. The kind that can be trusted, for the long haul. Like I said, we want the real.

Here's the good news. Once again, we are the potential heroes of our self made conflict. The decision is ours, and we have our own say in what we decide to do with it. And if you are a natural born leader, you can leverage this opportunity. Because we are in a good position to lead by example. We're the bridge generation - old enough to remember a quieter world, young enough to still be expected to keep up. And while that comes with its challenges, it also gives us something precious: perspective. Game changing perspective.

So if you’re like me—sitting in the dark after a midnight doorbell, heart pounding, wondering how we got here—just know you’re not alone. We’re all navigating this strange new world, one we actively participated in creating, together. Many of us are sitting back and reflecting, searching for what’s real in the noise of connections, cons, and chaos. Still longing for authenticity, even when it's not filtered. Especially when it's not filtered.

We can change the game...by not playing.